Kuba ingaragu ni amahitamo cyangwa ni ugutinya inshingano?

Iyo uganira n’urubyiruko rwarengeje imyaka yo gushaka ukababaza impamvu, babikubira mu mvugo yamamaye ngo: Nta Gikwe” bashaka kumvikanisha ko nta mpamvu nyine yo gukora ubukwe. Ariko se kuki bavuga batyo? Ingamba zaba izihe?

Umusore arageza ku myaka 40 nta gitekerezo afite hafi cyo gushinga urugo wamubaza impamvu ati nta bushobozi abandi bati Ingo z’iki gihe ni induru singiye gusazwa n’umukobwa wa mabukwe.

Hari n’umukobwa uherutse kumbwira ngo akurikije uko abo biganye bamutanze gushaka ariko bakaba bari kwiruka muri gatanya byamuciye intege nako byamuhumuye amaso ku buryo n’ubwo akunda abana ariko ngo yazinutswe ibyo gushaka.

Iyi nshuti yanjye ngo izabyara umwana ariko ntashaka kuzabana n’umugabo uzamutegeka, akamubuza uburenganzira burimo n’ubwo twisohokanira n’ inshuti ze mu birori byo ku mucanga I Rubavu.

Uretse ibi kandi hari ingo zirara zishya ariko mu gitondo bakajya mu kazi. Ahari wenda ubwu ubuzima umuntu yakwihanganira agashaka, ariko kandi hari abashakana bameze neza ndetse bakundana ariko amakimbirane yagera mu rugo, bakicana cyangwa umwe akajyana ubusembwa. Ibi rero biri mu bituma abakir5i bato batekereza kabiri mbere yo gushaka, ndetse bagahitamo kwiherera muri mpa numve.

Ubwo nandikaga iyi nkuru namanutse aha hafi nyabugogo nterura mu kigare cy ’abantu ndabaza nti ese abasore kuki batakirongora (gushaka) umwe ati babikora buri munsi.
Ndaseka nti oya si ibyo mvuze ahubwo nabaraga ibyo gushaka abagore ngo bashyingirwe bubake umuryango.

Bati mbese ni ibyo wavugaga? Ikiganiro kiba kiratangiye, umwe mu basore rwose ubona afite nk’imyaka 35 yavuze ko na we atarashaka ku mpamvu yemeza ko atashobora urugo muri iki gihe.

Yagize ati: “ubuzima bw’ iki gihe buragoye cyane no kubona ibintunga ndi umwe ni ihurizo rikomeye noneho najya gushyiraho n’umugore koko… ubwo noneho abyaye byagenda gute? Ntibyoroshye rwose.”

Abandi basore barasetse. Havamo undi atanga igusubizo gitandukanye ati: “none se, ni iki cyatuma nshaka Kandi buri gihe uko nshatse gukora imibonano n’umukobwa mbibona? Njyewe rwose biragoye ko nashaka kuko byarangira n’uwo nshatse dutandukanye.”

Muri iki kiganiro cy’urungano umukobwa nawe yanze kuripfana avuga ko n’ubwo nawe atarabona umugabo ariko atanamwifuza.

Ni amagambo yatangaje benshi bari aho batangira kumuha inkwenene bati ahubwo waramubuze.

Wa Mukobwa ubona ari nko mu myaka 24 yavuze ko nta cyanga cyo kubaka urugo yiyumvamo kuko abona abagabo bahindutse bashaka abagore bamara kubageza mu rugo bakabakorera ihohoterwa haba kubakubita ndetse no kubabuza uburenganzira bwabo.

Uyu ahuje imyumvire na ya nshuti yanjye ivuga ko ishaka kubyara umwana ikamurera aho kubana n’umugabo umutegeka ubuzima abaho, akamwambura ubwigenge.

Ni gute twisanze aha hantu?

Hirya no hino mu rubyiruko babona kuba ingaragu ari bwo buryo bwo kubaho bigenga kandi batekanye, bitandukanye no gushinga urugo. Kuko benshi bahuriza ku kuvuga ko ingo z’iki gihe zigaragaramo ihohoterwa ariko hakaba n’ikiguzi gihenze cy’ubuzima kibuza benshi kugoheka.

Joseph Hakuzwemuremyi, ni umunyamakuru ubirambyemo anibanda cyane ku buzima bw Igihugu n’ubw’abantu ariko akagira n’ikinyamakuru cyitwa Umuryango. Twaramwegereye ngo tuganire kuri iyi ngingo na we arabitwemerera.

Uyu musesenguzi ku ngingo yo kuba urubyiruko rutagishishikajwe no kubaka ingo, yagaragaje ko mbere umugore yashakaga umugabo kuko ari we wamutunga ariko kuri ubu akaba afite ubushobozi bwo kwitunga.

Ati: “hambere aha umugore ntiyari afite uburenganzira ku mitungo y’umuryango n’umugabo yajyaga gushaka arimo areba umugore w’umutima witonda urangwa n’imico myiza bitandukanye n’ubu, kuko uburezi kuri bose bwatanze ubushobozi ku buryo n’umugore asigaye ashoboye kwitunga.”

Joseph yakomeje avuga ko zimwe mu mpamvu urubyiruko ruhitamo kuguma mu bugaragu ari uko n’ubundi ibyo bashingaga urugo bashaka harimo umwana nibyishimo biba hagati y’umugabo n’umugore bisigaye byoroshye kubibona udashatse, kuko n’iyo umukobwa abyaye ahitamo kurera umwana wenyine yigenga nta mugabo uhari umuyobora.

Nta gitutu cy’imiryango kikibaho aho bakubwiraga ngo runaka yarashatse na runaka ni uko…, ugasanga nawe birakureba, ariko ubu ntaho umusore agihurira n’iwabo kubera gushaka ubuzima ahantu hari kure y’iwabo, arriko n’uri hafi ashaka inzu ye abamo nta byo kumubwira ngo urakuze mvira mu rugo. Usanga bajyayo rimwe mu mwaka nko kuri noheli.

Gusa nanone Yozefu akomeza avuga ko n’icyerekezo cy’isi gituma ubuzima buhenda, kiri mu mpamvu zituma abantu batabona gushaka nk’ikintu cyihutirwa.

Minisiteri y’uburinganire n’iterambere ry’umuryango ivuga iki kuri izi mpungenge?

Mu kiganiro Mireille BATAMULIZA, Umunyamabanga uhoraho muri Minisiteri y’uburinganire n’iterambere ry’umuryango yagiranye na Kigali Today, yavuze ko imiryango ari wo shingiro y’imbaga y’abanyarwanda kandi ko kubaka umuryango ushoboye kandi utekanye, bikwiye kuba intego ya buri wese.

Yunzemo ati: “⁠Gushaka cyangwa kubaka urugo ntabwo ari ibyo guhubukirwa. Ni yo mpamvu amategeko agira icyo ateganya ku bijyanye n’inshingano ndetse n’uko ibibazo byakemuka iyo bibaye. Urubyiruko ntirukwiye kumva ko gushaka ari ukubaho nabi cyangwa ngo bafate ingo zose ko zibayeho nabi. Bakwiye no kumenya ko imiryango myiza ihari kandi bakwiye no kugira ishyaka ryo kubaka imiryango mizima ntibacibwe integer n’abo babona bitagenze neza”.

Batamuriza yongeyeho ko kubaka umuryango mwiza, bisaba ubushake, ukimakaza ibiganiro, ukamenya ko uburere ari ingenzi… nawe ukaba utanze umusanzu wawe ku hazaza hawe no ku gihugu.

Batamuriza yasoje yibutsa urubyiruko ko hari imfashanyigisho yakozwe yitwa: “Twubake urugo rwiza”. Iyi mfashanyigisho yafasha kwiyungura ubumenyi, haba ku bitegura gushinga urugo cyangwa se abamaze kubana.

Abamaze gushinga ingo nabo bibukijwe ko ari indorerwamo abato bareberaho, bityo abasaba kwitwara neza, birinda ingeso mbi, birinda gukimbirana, ahubwo bagaharanira gukemura ibibazo mu ituze no mu bwubahane, aho byanze bakitabaza inzego zibishinzwe zikabafasha.

Mu ibarura rusange ryakozwe n’ikigo cy’ibarurishamirare mu mwaka wa 2022, ryagaragaje ko abagera kuri 49.2% ari bo bubatse ingo.

Muri bo harimo abashatse byemewe n’amategeko bangana na 31.2% naho ababana ariko bitemewe n’amategeko bangana na 16.9%. Abandi bagera kuri 1.1 bo baba mu buharike.

Iri barura kandi ryerekana ko abagera kuri 44.4% bafite imyaka kuva kuri 12 kuzamura, ari ingaragu, bakanongeraho ko umubare w’abahungu batarashaka ari wo munini ugereranyije n’abakobwa.